PHYSICAL THERAPY,WHAT A CHARM!

I thought I had his foot secured on my shoulder. I didn’t really think he could slide back in the chair, yet somehow, I knew he was done for.
Bob knew before I did. He started with the usual “This can’t be done, you are going to lose me, what the devil are you trying to do, etc.,etc.” and at the same time he finished, I felt him going.
“There he was, GONE!”
Blessedly, it is impossible to take a photograph of your situation while you are upside down, face first in the crotch a a large man that is currently tangle up in a mass of metal and leather. I know, this sounds like a scene from an x-rated movie. I suspect that it looked that way from the kitchen window.
The entire kitchen emptied out to get a better look. There is nothing more gratifying on this earth than to have an enthusiastic audience,
I say audience-I mean audience. They were all completely dumfounded and had no idea how to help me get un-tangled nor did they know how they were going to get Bob in the upright and operating position. Instead, they all stood there, mouths wide open looking ever so much like a bunch of hungry Venus fly traps.
Meanwhile, Bob and I were laughing so hard, we couldn’t help ourselves.
Finally, I extracted myself, stood up, wiped the tears from my eyes and had a thought. A “Blonde thought, to be sure, but a thought.
“Bob is upside down, legs in the air……what a great way to put on the braces!!!!”
Amid the wails of protests from Bob (who couldn’t do a thing about it) and multiple protests from the ever-so helpful audience I put the damn braces on! Damn, it was pretty easy. I bet you will not find a “put on the leg-brace “manual ANYWHERE that describes this a proper method of brace application.
Needless to say, Bob would never allow me to flip him upside down in order to put them on. Pity, it was so easy…
He always appeared “this close” to falling on his face, Mostly it was hard to watch, but, like any accident, it was hard not to.
Bob, not exactly Tinker Bell, was a “wee-bit” self-conscious and had to work twice as hard as he had before, because every time he faltered, someone would run out of the house and try to hold him up.
As a well-trained (I jest) “primary care person” it was my duty to pick him up if he fell. No one said anything about holding him up! I, therefore became the evil, sadistic, wife in the “spectator’s eyes.
We were determined to get to the point where Bob could ambulate by using the loft-strand crutches. We pressed on.
Bob and I determined that the ambulating without the safety of the parallel bars could only be achieved after he had completely stretched out and was able to establish a rhythm with the bars, then once a round trip was accomplished, I would hand over the loft-strands and off he’d go. Great theory –poor execution….neither one of us wanted an audience, so we stuck to the bars. At least it was a success. Bob was ambulating up and down the bars pretty well after a few hesitant starts.
We learned to cherish new “Successes”
Like any accident, the novelty wore off. The audience dwindled and the routine continued with no further incidents. I got pretty good at putting the braces on and Bob got VERY good at stretching out and zipping up and down the parallel bars This was a good thing. It kept his skin from breaking down , his digestive tract working at peak capacity and most of all, it gave him a goal.