The tedium is often broken by little things, such as the cold inflicted puff and blow chair operator. But not often enough.
The occasional visit by a doctor to tell you how broken you still are and visitors.
Sometimes, one just has to manufacture excitement, just to get by.
For Bob this was difficult. He was still in the Teflon tuxedo and when ever he was sent to bed (usually after annoying the nurses and P.Ts to the point of distraction) they put his chair in the hall. I think they were truly afraid that he would try to escape. Therefore, as his primary care person, I became the self -anointed Diversionary Tactician.
It was now July 26,1980. Two days left to figure out a "Perfect" Birthday surprise.
Hanging around "Baggage-smashers" and aircraft mechanics tended to lean one's thoughts towards the rude, crude, and socially unacceptable.
I ordered a cake from the local x-rated bakery. (Bet there isn't one in your neighborhood), but we definitely needed something different, exciting , DISRUPTING!
voila! IT WAS PERFECT! There was no danger-if anyone there had a sexual thought, they couldn't act on it. If they somehow found a way to get near, you could slash their tires and leave 'em in a corner! A BELLY DANCER!! That was it.
The party plans would take three phone calls. One to Braniff Operations( for guests) one to the belly-gram folks, and one to my Aunt Birdie! These three calls could round up enough people to pack Fenway Park!
The entire operation took approximately 20 minutes to organize. The one thing that slipped my mind, was to check with the nurse on the floor-woops!
Everyone gathered in the lobby on the first floor then came up the elevator. Then they his in the hallway, outside Bob's wing, barracks, cell block, whatever.
Then, the belly dancer got on the elevator with her "boom-box". By this time the nurses were a bit flummoxed (easily done). When it was explained, they started gathering the patients from other wings, We could hear the usual elevator noise coming up the shaft with the addition of coins jingling. Sounded a bit strange, but Bob was still in the dark.
All of a sudden, the elevator door burst open and the music started blaring, coins clanging together and castanets clicking wildly. The dancer gyrated her way to Bob's bedside. Every patient in the place was oohing, aahing and drooling, including Bob.
This gal was pretty savvy. She got just out of reach of Bob's outstretched arm.
It took they entire evening to pick the floor-grit out of his teeth!
We then brought in the cake. This sent Bob's legs into spasm.
Standing at the end of the bed was Laura. She was the secretary at Braniff. Bless her heart, she used to complain constantly about her weight. She had often stated
that she had, over the course of her life, lost one million pounds. This complaint was usually accompanied by a big Mac, large fry and diet coke.
She was delightful person and truly a joy to have around. Bob enjoyed her visits as long as she didn't get too sympathetic and morose.
When Bob's legs started to spasm, She shrieked then went pure white. I thought she was going to faint. Then she started shouting (over the music) "It's a miracle It's a miracle!, Bob can walk!!!!" Bob and I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. I had all could do to calm her down. Bob finally yelled at her "Yo, dingbat, I am having a spasm,1 CAN'T FEEL IT!" Then Laura started to cry, couldn't help it, we all started to laugh. It was a honest mistake (l guess). Every patient in the spinal chord rehab center, had spasms before. Some had them with such ferocity that they had to be strapped in their chairs to keep from being propelled to the floor.
Finally, the belly dancer left( with a very confused look on her face).Oh, before she left, she did give Bob a birthday kiss.....He still thinks of it to this day. She was a knock-out. I still remember it to this day!
Everyone was eating their piece( of cake) and we got to explain fully to Laura that Bob was not going to chase her down the hall.
The entire afternoon was worth the reprimand I received from the head nurse.
Evidently, I had somehow, ruined their whole schedule. One might think I set those poor patients back a years worth of progress. Personally I think that is as close to walking again as they held since their injuries.
It was that coming weekend that Bob was temporarily paroled.......
Posts
